30 Days of Kink: Day 14

08 Mar

Day 14: How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink? If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink how do you think it might differ?

Wait. You mean it’s not all about the naked slaves waiting on my every whim? Damnit.

In a real BDSM relationship I require my lovers to be someone I trust. I need to trust that they’ll not harm me, that they’ll listen to me if I tell them a tie is too tight or if I need to use my safeword, that they’ll use a condom if we are not fluid bonded. As sexy as the though of the tall, dark dom pushing you up against the bricks in the alleyway and having his way with you is, it’s something I would never be comfortable with unless I already a)knew him b) knew his STD status c) knew he would be using a condom unless we were fluid bonded and d) could be sure he’d not harm me.

Most of my kinky fantasy scenes don’t have things like safewords, trust, hell, most of them are lacking in consent. There’s also things that sound great while you’re two seconds away from a great orgasm that I would never do in real life. (I call those ‘lobster bisque moments’. As in ‘Oh gods, you want to dip my toes in lobster bisque then lick them clean? Yeah, baby. Oh gods, I want you so much!’)

Also, fantasies like being ravished, then bitten by a vampire? Hurt a fucking hell of a lot more in real life. Just sayin’. 😉

1 Comment

Posted by on March 8, 2011 in BDSM, Sex


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One response to “30 Days of Kink: Day 14

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